Crucial

Conversatio ns

tough talks demand special skills

by Jeanette Vaughan Duric

“Mommy, why don’t my legs work?”

“It’s not fair, Harrison gets all the attention. What about us? Don’t we matter?”

“You’re my husband. Why can’t we talk any more?”

“What exactly do you mean, there’s no cure?”

These are important, tough questions. As a parent and caregiver, how can you respond to your child’s questions about his or her disease — and the concerns of your other children? How can you and your significant other communicate effectively about your fear and grief? How can you get answers from health care professionals that address your real questions?

If only we knew how to have these “crucial conversations” with the professionals, our loved ones, and, most importantly, ourselves.

Learning to talk

Even though we all learned how to speak at a young age, at times we simply cannot get across the message we so desperately want to share. Pitfalls in delivery and emotional bombshells can cause fear and anxiety that block the pathway of a message.

Thankfully, there’s a solution to the problem of poor communication. When the stakes are high, as they are when a child has a serious illness, communication can be enhanced by using tried-and-true techniques that improve speaking, listening and problem-solving skills. There are many pro-